How to Communicate Your Anger In An Effective Way

Getting angry is completely normal. Most of us haven’t been taught how to communicate our anger and it can feel very difficult to control at times. Here are a few strategies that may help you express your anger in a healthier and more effective way!

Try to find the trigger.

Try identifying and communicating the thoughts that triggered the anger. If you can't directly talk to the person you're angry with, you can journal your thoughts or communicate with a therapist or someone you trust.

How does your body feel when you're mad?

If you've ever snapped at someone or acted impulsively without even realizing you were mad, then try to identify how your body feels when you get angry. Once you know the ways your body physically reacts to anger, you can start taking steps to cool down before trying to communicate with someone.

Take a break before you respond.

Don't get impulsive and react right away. Try taking a break to calm down and to process what's going on in your mind before you figure out what you really want to say. To get some space, go for a walk to remove yourself from the situation. During your break, you might also want to try taking some deep breaths or writing out your feelings in a journal.

Write out a script before a confrontation.

Consider writing down what you want to say to help you communicate your needs clearly. Prepping for a convo is a great way to get clear on your own feelings and what you want to talk about and why. Write down exactly what you want to say about what's bugging you and what your needs are. Then, see if you're saying it in an effective, direct manner or if you could work on your delivery a bit more!

Talk and listen.

Communicating effectively involves talking and listening. When we're mad, we may just talk without pausing to hear what the other person has to say, which the other person might interpret as rude and lead to an unproductive one-sided talk.

Use "I" statements.

If you're telling someone all of the things they did to piss you off, they will likely go into defense mode. Practice using "I" statements, which allows us to take responsibility for our own feelings. This will help avoid blaming others for how you feel and give you the space to ask for what you actually want or need.

Consider skipping it.

If you feel like you can't talk to the person who made you angry without it turning into something ugly, try another coping strategy to get your anger out. It might help to talk it out with someone you trust who will help you look at the situation from all sides. Or you might want to get out your journal and write what you wish you could say to them.

Remember that everyone feels angry from time-to-time, but it’s about how you handle those emotions that matters most. We hope you find these tips helpful to handle your anger in the most effective way!

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