How to Prevent and Overcome Burnout
We recently sat down with Dr. Jessi Gold, psychiatrist and author of How Do You Feel?, to explore the inspiration behind her book, the warning signs of burnout, strategies for preventing it, and what to do if you’re already experiencing burnout. We hope you find our interview with Dr. Gold insightful and informative!
What inspired you to write your book ‘HOW DO YOU FEEL?’ and what topics do you cover in the book?
The inspiration for How Do You Feel came from my work as a psychiatrist, primarily treating college students and healthcare workers, especially during the pandemic. I was hearing frontline workers’ stories of burnout while experiencing it myself, and it became clear that this was a story that needed to be told. The book is part memoir and part patient narrative, featuring healthcare workers and those adjacent to the field, like a premed student, nurse, resident, and ER doctor. It explores how hard it is to care for ourselves when we're busy caring for others, a struggle that exists in healthcare but applies to many other fields as well.
The driving question behind the book was, "Am I bad at this, and are others bad at this too? Should we be talking more about it?" It’s not just a COVID issue; it's something that existed before and will persist after. We all need to recognize that the people who care for us are human too, and they need to remember that about themselves.
What is burnout? What systemic changes would you like to see to help prevent burnout? How can supervisors identify and better assist someone who might be struggling?
Burnout is often misunderstood, so let me start by defining it. It's not just about feeling tired or overwhelmed; it’s a workplace-related combination of three main things: emotional exhaustion, depersonalization (or cynicism), and a reduced sense of personal accomplishment. Emotional exhaustion is when you’re completely drained at the end of the day. Depersonalization means you're disconnected from your work or, in some cases, angry and frustrated. Lastly, burnout affects your sense of achievement—you’re not getting things done, even if you want to.
One key to preventing burnout is checking in with yourself regularly. A therapist once asked me, "Have you ever really stopped to ask how you feel?" It’s a simple question, but most of us never do it. We measure our well-being based on external factors—like grades or work performance—without noticing deeper issues like exhaustion or disconnection. By the time it impacts work or school, burnout has already set in. Early self-awareness helps you catch those changes before they snowball.
It's also important to pay attention to personal burnout signs. For me, it's feeling angry at my email. I realized it wasn’t just about the messages—it was the pressure of more demands when I already felt stretched too thin. Knowing your triggers can help you take action earlier, like implementing coping strategies before you're completely burnt out.
When it comes to supervisors helping struggling employees, the approach matters. Instead of pointing out flaws or poor performance, it's better to ask open-ended questions and really listen. Show vulnerability too—this builds trust and makes people more likely to share. If employees feel judged, they’ll shut down. But if they feel supported, they'll seek help sooner.
On a larger scale, we need systemic changes, like more flexible workspaces, mental health days, and policies that reduce burnout. In healthcare, for example, the reality of the job often involves more paperwork than patient care, which adds to burnout. While it’s frustrating that individuals may not be able to change these bigger systems, focusing on what you can control—how you check in with yourself and support others—makes a huge difference. Recognizing the problem and addressing it early can lead to real, positive change.
What leads people towards burnout and what advice would you give to them?
Burnout is always rooted in the system of work, and what your workplace looks like depends on your role. For example, if you're in school, your workplace is school; if you're a stay-at-home parent, your workplace is home. Burnout can happen anywhere, not just traditional jobs.
A big cause of burnout is the mismatch between expectation and reality. You might think your job or college will be a certain way, but when it turns out completely different, that's frustrating. In healthcare, for instance, people often enter the field for patient care, but end up spending more time on paperwork. This disconnect between what you want to be doing and what you're actually doing is a major contributor to burnout.
Lack of support and redundancy in the workplace is another factor. If you're the only person in a role, it feels impossible to take time off without burdening others. In healthcare, that’s compounded by the fact that calling out sick can directly affect patient care. This leads to presenteeism—showing up when you're not well enough to work, which is more common in healthcare but exists across many fields.
Many people also feel they haven’t "earned" the right to take a day off unless they’re visibly unwell. Mental health struggles like burnout don’t seem to justify time off in the same way physical illness does. But it’s crucial to understand that burnout is real and has a significant impact on your life. You don't have to earn a day off—it’s part of your job benefits, and you're entitled to use it without needing to explain yourself. Taking care of yourself shouldn’t require justification, and recognizing this is key to preventing burnout.
What are some of the warning signs of burnout?
It's important to understand that burnout is different from depression, though they often get mixed up. Depression involves mood changes, loss of interest, and can include symptoms like sleep disturbances, concentration problems, or even suicidal thoughts. Burnout, while linked to depression, is different and can occur alongside it.
One of the first signs of burnout is the "Sunday scaries." It's more than just dreading work; it's thinking, “Maybe I’ll get sick or have a flat tire, just so I don’t have to go.” When work feels overwhelming and weekends or vacations are the only times you feel better, that’s a big red flag.
Other early signs include anger, especially over little things like emails or requests. Anger can be overlooked, but it's a sign something is wrong. Overwhelm is another indicator—you plan, but you can't get anything done, or you start avoiding tasks altogether.
Burnout can also show up in small lifestyle changes, like ordering takeout instead of cooking even though you enjoy it, or not getting dressed for work if you normally would. It’s not that you’re too sad to cook or shower; it’s more about lacking the energy to do things you once enjoyed.
You may also notice a decline in social interactions. When I was burnt out, I stopped replying to texts, which was unusual for me. My friends noticed and checked in, but I just didn’t have the capacity to engage after spending all my energy at work.
These subtle shifts in behavior are important warning signs to pay attention to, especially if you find yourself withdrawing from things or people that usually matter to you.
What coping mechanism did you personally use to handle burnout?
When I say I burnt out, I really burnt out—and I didn’t even realize it. My therapist was the one who named it for me, and that was a big wake-up call. As someone who helps others manage burnout, it was hard to admit I didn’t see it in myself.
The truth is, it's difficult to notice because we’ve normalized burnout as a part of work. We're afraid that acknowledging it means we’re the problem, but that’s not true—the work is the problem. So, if you don’t catch it right away, don’t be too hard on yourself.
What helped me was learning to check in with myself, asking "How do I feel?" at the start or end of the day. I also focus on transitions between tasks, like taking a few minutes to reset after a difficult meeting instead of carrying that energy with me.
Another important factor is meaning and purpose. It sounds philosophical, but it’s easy to lose sight of why you care about your work when you're overwhelmed by the daily grind. I make sure to reconnect with what energizes me, whether that’s mentoring, connecting with friends, or even reviewing positive feedback I’ve received.
Finally, self-compassion has been a game-changer. I used to think burnout meant I failed—that if I were good enough at my job, I shouldn’t feel this way. But that mindset just doesn’t make sense. I’ve worked to be kinder to myself, like I would be to a friend, and that’s made a huge difference. I also go to therapy and take medication, both of which help me stay grounded and effective in my work. There's no shame in using the tools that help you thrive.
What is your favorite form of self-care?
I love a guilt-free nap or a mindless TV show, but sometimes I rely on those too much and realize I need to do something else. After a tough work week, I'll binge-watch TV until Netflix is like, "Are you still watching?" And I’ll think, "Oh wow, I’ve been here for hours." And while there's no harm in that, I also try to be mindful of whether I’m avoiding other things. If it's helpful, it's helpful, and I avoid telling myself, "You're being lazy, do something else."
At the same time, I try to think of other ways to cope. Beyond just resting, I make an effort to reach out to a friend and do something social. As much as I might want to isolate and sleep, I know that’s only part of what helps. Connecting with someone for good conversation also makes sure I’m not alone with my thoughts all day.
Thank you so much to Dr. Jessi Gold for all her insight into burnout!
How Do You Feel? is available now.
