Tips and Tricks for Handling Intergenerational Trauma
Intergenerational trauma is a term that is often thrown around these days, but what does it actually mean? Many of us are impacted by intergenerational trauma and may not even realize it. The Lemons team sat down with Maryellen Dance, a Licensed Mental Health Counselor, professor, and host of the Okay-ish Podcast, to hear what intergenerational trauma is all about so we could give you the facts.
What is intergenerational trauma?
Trauma that gets passed down by generations. For example, If your parent doesn’t cope with their mental illness (anxiety, depression, etc), they can pass it down to their children. This is very similar to vicarious trauma which is trauma that comes from hearing about others’ trauma. For example, a child hearing about a traumatic event that their parent went through.
What are some examples of intergenerational trauma?
If a parent was sexually abused, they may tend to push people away and be very untrusting of others. In turn, their children may learn these tendencies and push people away in their own lives.
Black parents may have their guards up and feel trauma due to history so their children may learn these things and also feel the same way.
If a parent loses a parent early in their life, they may become very clingy with their own children
What are some signs of intergenerational trauma?
Lots of family tension
Distance
Disconnection
Hypervigilance
Type A
Parents may minimize the child's experience when they come to them for help
“No, you’re fine”
“Stop overreacting”
What are some tips for breaking the cycle?
Acknowledge the problem
Recognize the behaviors you don’t want to do
If its a safe environment, talk about it with your parents
Find a therapist to talk about it
Confide in a loved one or close friends
We hope this information will prove to be helpful to you as it has to us. It is crucial to keep in mind that intergenerational trauma can look very different for everyone and is very subjective.
Follow Maryellen Dance on Instagram here and listen to her podcast here!
